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Old 03-27-2018, 08:15 PM   #1
Brent
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Inspired by the quote below, this thread is for memorializing great posts or awful takes that should never be forgotten. Please only post quotes, any discussion should take place in the original thread or the Random Discussion Thread.

Quote:
Originally Posted by dg151 View Post
I'm going to Italy for 2 weeks and I'm not gonna drink any wine because wine is trash.

Last edited by Brent; 03-27-2018 at 10:20 PM.
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Old 03-27-2018, 08:21 PM   #2
dg151
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bigbluedefense View Post
But it's only aids blood if the person has aids right? We don't have a container full of aids blood in our asses do we?
^^
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Originally Posted by ToldLikeItIs View Post
Please don't berate me for being insanely right, all the time.
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Old 03-27-2018, 10:19 PM   #3
OSUGiants
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Originally Posted by TebowTheGod View Post
I used to masturbate onto birds at a local park. Not a thing that I'm particularly proud of but I became quite good at it. I was taking zinc supplements so I was shooting massive loads and it became something of a sport to me. For anyone interested here is your best strategy. first, you need to find an isolated spot so you don't become a sex offender. I found a short kind of channel area where I saw the pigeons would congregate. Next, you arouse yourself. I was usually content with envisioning the occasional jogging lady coming over and taking a shit on my chest and that was enough to fuel the fire but if you're not as sexually charged as me just take some porn on the go. After you're good an horny, you get some bread. My pigeons preferred white bread but healthier birds might have a taste for honey wheat or maybe even multigrain. Fat, unhealthy birds are slower and easier to hit so remember that. Once you are seated on the bench and ready to do the deed, whip your roosevelt out and scatter bread out within a few feet of you. use your judgement based on how far you know you can cum. I was a lonely and depraved soul who could hit targets the size of a thimble at distances up to 4 feet. You wait for the pigeons to begin eating and to get comfortable with your presence. At this point, you want to coo gently and talk sensually to them to gain their trust. Now you're finally ready to cum on your bird. This is a tough part because the rapid motion of masturbation is very frightening to the birds, so you have to be subtle. Once you master a technique, you simply wind it up and let it go, aiming depending on your past cumming experiences. I always came high so I would aim for the neck of the bird and catch it right in the face. It's an extremely satisfying and erotic feeling, seeing those birds reel around covered in cum and maybe even transporting it to other places in the city. Either way I haven't done it in years but every now and then I catch myself gazing wistfully at a flock of birds, cock throbbing and waiting for them to land close to me.
Edit: apparently this is a famous copypasta. It’s a lot less funny now
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Last edited by OSUGiants; 03-29-2018 at 12:13 AM.
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Old 03-01-2019, 06:54 PM   #4
Brent
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Good night, sweet prince.

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Originally Posted by Zach View Post
So I received in the mail an offer at a local bank that I am pre-approved for a personal loan, up to $15,000. I have been thinking about taking up on this loan, but for a very small amount. The reason is I am just sick of fucking working at McDonalds, and this would allow me to visit friends and family and actually spend time with them, rather than working the whole time. The interest is pretty high, but with the money I saved from my post a few days ago about the student loans, it opens up the money for me to do it.

Should I do the loan and enjoy friends and family time, or slave away at McD's? Keep in mind that it will be years before I see these people again. This job is a one year commitment, but the plan is to relocated to another country and teach there as well.
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Old 10-20-2019, 02:23 PM   #5
Kyle
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2 characters

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Originally Posted by bigbluedefense View Post
"we asked a bunch of liberal college professors who they thought was the best president ever. Here's their list"

Yeah. I'm good. Thanks.

Franklin wasn't even close to his Teddy in terms of long term impact on the country. You could argue that Teddy is the greatest president ever. The Louisiana purchase and the prioritization of our military under him were the 2 most important decisions ever made by our country.
Quote:
Franklin wasn't even close to his Teddy in terms of long term impact on the country. You could argue that Teddy is the greatest president ever. The Louisiana purchase and the prioritization of our military under him were the 2 most important decisions ever made by our country.
Quote:
You could argue that Teddy is the greatest president ever. The Louisiana purchase and the prioritization of our military under him were the 2 most important decisions ever made by our country.
Quote:
You could argue that Teddy is the greatest president ever. The Louisiana purchase
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